


drunk words are sober thoughts

by campbellswolfe



Category: Holby City
Genre: Drunk Bernie Wolfe, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, what more could you want tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-02
Updated: 2017-05-02
Packaged: 2018-10-27 02:45:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10800075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/campbellswolfe/pseuds/campbellswolfe
Summary: Bernie drinks everyone under the table and then decides to send Serena a voice message on her way back home. Then she realises she fucked up... in a good way though.





	drunk words are sober thoughts

"Do your worst"

::::::

It is a well known fact that Berenice Wolfe has great skill in being able to handle her drink. All those years in the military and having to be able to keep up with all of the men drinking into the small hours of the morning often means she's the last to leave every party or gathering. That is until she is challenged. And boy, does Berenice Wolfe like a challenge. But these challenges often end up making her regret her boasting whilst in a sober state as she's clinging to the toilet bowl for dear life the next morning, one hand gripping her hair back out of her face.

::::::

"Five tequila shots, please, make them quick" Ric glanced over at Bernie with a smirk on his face as he handed over a crisp ten pound note to the barman. "Let's see who'll be needing a nap soon then, shall we?"

The five of them all said cheers and down the first round went, salt licked and limes sucked too. Morven, Fletch and Ollie were groaning and retching at the vile taste.

"Another round, please!" Bernie and Ric both shouted simultaneously whilst slamming their empty glasses onto the bar. They did three more rounds of tequila before coming to a mutual decision to take a break to finish their wine, whiskey and beers which had been forgotten about. Rounds of different alcoholic beverages kept coming in and it was Morven who was the first to back out and head home. She hopped off from the bar stool, holding onto Bernie's shoulder for support as she found her balance, said her goodbyes and clambered outside to catch a taxi.

"And then there were four" Bernie piped up.

"Seems so, Major. Dare you to down some of that red stuff?" Fletch pointed carelessly over at the bottles lined up behind the bar, nearly knocking over his glass of vodka and coke.

"Alright... Excuse me?" Bernie summoned the barman over to them. "I'll have six shots of whatever that horrible looking red stuff is, please?"

"That's brave, Bernie. Are you sure you can handle that?"

"For that cheek, Ric, we're splitting these, three each and the last to finish buys the rounds for the rest of the night." Of course, Bernie wins, much to Ric's horror.

Fletch was next to bow out as he was on an early shift the next day and had the kids to get back to. He stood in between both Bernie and Ric and put an arm around both of their shoulders. "My money's on the Major" he said before slapping Ric's back in jest and walking out of the pub laughing to himself. They looked around for Ollie but he must have secretly slipped away whilst there was a crowd around Ric and Bernie watching them compete against one another. Ric made a mental note of this.

::::::

Bernie excused herself to go to the toilet. She grabbed her phone, certain she seen it light up a little while ago. And she was right.

**Text message:**

**The Girlfriend**

_Do hope you are enjoying your evening. I also hope you know you made it onto one of the young F1's snapchat stories. Had no idea what I was clicking on but glad I clicked whatever I did. New to all of that malarky. Just take care of yourself. Much love and be careful. S x_

Bernie sent back a simple "XXX", not trusting herself to type out a proper message for the fear of the amount of spelling mistakes she'd probably make. She could do that tomorrow, that's if she even made it home at this point as Ric wasn't backing down.

::::::

"I was starting to think you'd fallen down the toilet, Major. Still up for continuing?"

"Always. Bring it on!"

Another five rounds of shots went down a treat along with three neat whiskeys, two pints and a gin each. It wasn't until Ric was stumbling around attempting to dance to a random song that came on the jukebox whilst spilling his drink all over the floor that he had decided enough was enough. In all fairness, Bernie was swaying about at the bar too, chanting the words to whatever Blondie song was on, she couldn't quite remember the name but took no shame in screaming the French parts of the song at the top of her lungs.

::::::

Ric was long gone but Bernie had stayed behind a little while longer just enjoying the music and calmness of the place. She did have a good evening, it was a distraction from the emptiness she had been feeling what with Serena being absent from Holby. She had to get some help leaving the premises though and was slurring her words.

"Excuse me, um, Mr Barman, would you mind terribly un-unlocking this device for me?"

He took Bernie's right hand and placed her thumb to the home button and gently nudged Bernie out the door. The cold air hit Bernie instantly and it was enough to waken her up a bit. She hated the walk back to the house, especially tonight knowing she wouldn't be going back to Serena. Stopping for a moment to tap her phone into action once more, she noticed two unread messages sent two hours ago.

**Text message - Attachments (1):**

**The Girlfriend**

_Have had a lovely week in sunny Spain. I have added a pic from this evening, hope it gets to you okay. It's gorgeous out here. Moving onto Germany tomorrow, I haven't decided between Berlin or Munich yet, we'll see. Ring me at some point next week. Sleep well. My love, always. S x_

**Attachment (1/1):**

_Here's me outside a gorgeous little bar in Madrid. The sangria in my hand went down a treat and those sunglasses cost me almost £150 but I'm not caring, they do look rather fabulous, don't they? X_

Bernie zoomed in and out of the photo for a short while before continuing walking. She smiled as she examined every part of Serena's face closely. _She seems happy and carefree_ Bernie thought to herself. She replied...

 

_Lookin good, girl! [insert four heart eye emojis here]_

 

_Good 2 see that smile X_

 

_Speak next week._

 

Bernie remembered something that Jason had showed the pair of them before Serena left for her sabbatical. It was the voice message feature on iMessage, just in case one of them wanted to offload their feelings to the other and it'd be forgotten about after the message was listened to. So Bernie hit record as she continued walking...

_"Is this bloody thing wor- OH, there we go... I heard the little crackle which means it's on. I've had a little too much to drink this evening but it has been a good night. I wish you were here though. I'm sure you'd have given me a run for my money if we'd have let you loose on the Shiraz. I drank the lot of them under the table and had to be removed from the pub when I was the only one left, bastards. I didn't want to wait until next week to talk to you, well, we aren't technically talking right now because you'll just be listening to this but I hope you still know how much I love you and I can't wait for you to come back to me soon. When you're ready though. I'll be waiting for you. You're always on my mind, you know. Oh god, I sound like Elvis Presley. YOU WERE ALWAYS ON MY MIIIIND or however that song go-"_

A chuckle elicited from the other end of the phone. Bernie stopped dead in her tracks and the phone slipped from hands, instantly hitting the pavement.

"Oh shit!"

Bending down to pick it up, all she could hear was that same giggle coming via the phone. She held it up to her ear.

"Ahhh... You're a bloody fool, you are, Berenice. And just FYI, you're always on my mind too"

"S-Serena? Is that yo-"

"No. It's the man on the moon. Of course it's me, you wally. Where are you?"

"Nearly home. Are you ok? Sorry, if... if I woke you? Pressed the wrong damn button" 

"It's you I'm worried about. Make sure you get back alright. I need to go because this will be costing you a bloody fortune"

"It's worth it to hear your voice" Serena could almost hear the smile in Bernie's voice.

"You won't be saying that when you get your bill in at the end of the month. Text me when you're home and hug Jason for me when you next see him."

"Love you, Campbell" 

"And I, you, Wolfe"

Before Bernie could respond, Serena had hung up. She made her way into the house, got herself all ready for bed and tucked up under the duvet on Serena's side. If she tried hard enough she could still smell her on the pillow. Bernie quickly grabbed her phone before sleep completely took over her and took a selfie of herself with her eyes closed, hair all spread out on the pillow and sent the photo to Serena.

_Home now. Nice to speak to you. Can sleep well now._

It only took Serena seconds to respond, almost as though she was waiting to make sure Bernie was home safe and sound. 

_Good, I'm glad. Also nice to see you're keeping MY side of the bed warm, you bugger! Sleep well. Chat next week. S x_

_Sorry, just missing you. Had water and painkillers, thank god I have day off tomoz. Love you._

_I'll be back before you know it. Take care. All my love. S x_

And with that, Bernie fell asleep with a smile on her face.

:::::: The Next Morning ::::::  
Bernie woke up to a voice message from Serena. The brightness on her phone bringing on an instant headache. 

_"I'm assuming this is the button you meant to press last night at 1am, Ms Wolfe. I'm not complaining though, you did put a smile on my face. I hope you're not too worse for wear this morning. But just in case you are, I've asked Jason to head over in a bit with some nice, wobbly,"_

Bernie gagged at the thought.

_"runny poached eggs for you to enjoy this morning."_

She dashed to the bathroom, flinging up the toilet seat to vomit violently, the phone now forgotten about on the floor beside her as she brings up the contents of last night's antics. She noticed one last thirteen second voice message. She hit play once more.

_"That's what you get for waking me up at one in the morning screaming Elvis Presley down my ear. Hopefully see you soon. I miss you. Be kind to yourself, Bernie."_

Bernie composed herself and picked up her phone. She hit the record button.

_"Oh, you are evil, Campbell. But I love you."_

::::::

**Author's Note:**

> okay so this is probably really shitty, this idea just came to me at the end of the episode lmao but OH WELL. Enjoy anyway and as always, your feedback is most welcome! Xo


End file.
